Lack of Assertiveness and Stress
Assertive- Definition: to be self confident
Fear of Confrontation and the Build up of Anger
Many people lack the self confidence to stick up for themselves. This can often be caused by a fear of confrontation. Backing down can often lead to the person becoming angry but unable to show or express it. Over time with repeated incidents the internal anger builds up to such a point that when it finally comes to the surface the reaction is over the top and extreme, often inappropriate to the actual circumstances in which they react.
Developing the ability to deal with situations as they happen reduces the build up of anger. It also increases self esteem.
Assertive not Aggressive
Assertiveness must never be confused with aggressiveness. It is perfectly possible to be assertive without being aggressive. A friend of mine at university had one of the nicest ways of being assertive. She could say absolutely anything to anyone but she said it in such a way that no one became offended.
Fear of Confrontation
Eliminating the fear of confrontation can lead to the individual becoming naturally more assertive in a way that is right for their personality. Most people naturally find that they become assertive when their fear of confrontation is removed. There are many different techniques that can be used to eliminate a fear of confrontation. EFT™, TAT™, NLP, hypnosis are all effective in dealing with this kind of issue.
There are techniques for developing new behaviors. The NLP modeling technique being one of them. Sometimes people need to develop the skill to be assertive. Being assertive is not about mimicking the behavior of other individuals who are naturally assertive, because mimicking can feel false. Identifying role models can be useful. When you have identified a role model you can then adapt the behavior to fit in with your unique personality. Using the modeling technique you can then program the behavior into your subconscious mind, so that it becomes a natural part of you. In other words you naturally and automatically behave assertively without having to make a conscious effort to do so.
Stress and Lack of Assertive
Lacking the ability to be assertive in situations can lead to a build up of stress. Over time this can impact on the self image and self esteem as the person can think of themselves as “weak”. Developing the ability to be naturally assertive can have a big impact on the build of stress over time.
Lack of Assertiveness and Stress Conditions
Lack of assertiveness can lead to a build up of stress. There are many medical conditions that can be linked to stress, IBS being one such condition.
Since reducing the overall stress load on the body can be part of a treatment plan working with many issues, developing a personality that is less likely to allow a build up of stress is very advantageous. Therefore eliminating any fear of confrontation and developing the natural ability to deal with situations as they arise would take out one of the factors contributing to stress build up as well as having a positive effect on the self esteem. Because when people stand up for themselves this can have a very positive effect on how they see themselves.